Right path with models?

Hi Brooke, I have two models that I’m currently working through in regards to what my sister texted to me. Here they are:
C Sister texted: If you’d hang around family more maybe you would know.
T She’s always got to say hurtful comments.
F Sad, hurt
A Think hurtful thoughts, complain to my fiancé, want to say hurtful things back
R- thinking hurtful things?

I’m not sure on my reesult here. Sometimes I do say hurtful things back to her and other times I don’t. Is that two different models then?

The other model:
C same as above
T I should be spending more time with my family.
F guilt
A beat myself up, try to take more time to spend with them
R ?

I keep asking myself why her comment bothers me. I also don’t feel obligated to need to spend more time with them. What do you do with “should” thoughts?

Thanks Brooke!