Shame & drama

Dear coaches,
Could you please advise me on two following situations that I struggle with:
1. Through the self coaching I realized that I feel certain discomfort in relation with one of my friends because “I am ashamed because of his appearance”. I make it mean that I’m a bad and judgmental person, who thinks about what other people can think. This make the situation even worse. Could you please advice how to find another believable thought and not feel shame.
2. When I realize that I make drama around some situation, how should I stop doing it and move to the calm place?

Thank you!