Showing up / best foot forward / jeans rut


Unintentional model:
C: clothes
T: Ugh, it doesn’t make a difference because it’s winter and I’m cold so I’ll wear jeans every day
F: frumpy (does that count as a feeling?)
A: subtle differences in my posture, attitude out in public, behavior at home.
R: still in rut of wearing jeans nearly every day. Identity cemented that I’m not all that attractive or outgoing.

I do believe the intentional thought I came up with, but am having trouble consistently implementing it.

C: Clothes
T: my whole life is better when I put my best foot forward
F: attractive
A: wear the cute clothes I have, stand up straighter, smile more, more outgoing and friendly, show up more as my best
R: life is better; the story I tell myself is 180 degrees better

I’ve really noticed this is a thing where I can improve. And now that I’m over 40 I definitely notice a difference in how people react to me and how I feel about myself if I dress up or don’t. Maybe it was always there.

This is the thing I’ve noticed I want to work on in the weeks following being coached live by Brooke on what was essentially a self-image problem (“I’m not the girl who” blah blah blah).

The irony with this is I just listened to Brooke’s new podcast on what you tolerate. I saw on a deeper level how just using willpower to not go into Nordstrom and buy clothes to buffer from the “best self” I really would rather be showing up to, hasn’t worked. Willpower is why I don’t have an *overflowing* closet of clothes I don’t wear, but not showing up to my real self is why I have a good wardrobe I don’t wear much, and end up wearing stuff that kinda makes me feel bad about myself. More days than not.

January has been a month of rewriting the story of my self belief and what kind of woman I allow myself to be. Life did not assign me a “job title” and “uniform” — I am really starting to believe that ME is up to ME and not others.

Any suggestions here?