Stopped overdrinking – and mourning loss of certain aspects of my drinking life

I have reduced my drinking to practically nothing. I simply don’t have a desire for it anymore. (Ironically, reducing overdrinking, overeating, and overspending happened organically as a result of all the model work, even before I found out you had specific programs for these types of things!)

And since then, I’ve realized I don’t like spending time with my family. My family is very close – aunts, uncles, and cousins and all the kids and babies – we mostly live in the same area and spend a lot of time together. The only problem is that all the adults drink – A LOT. I knew we drank a lot, but I always thought it was totally fine, no big deal. Now I see that the fact that everyone is a “happy drunk” just masks the negative parts of it, and all the buffering. There are many functional alcoholics. Weekend binge drinkers. The last few family parties – a couple I hosted myself – were just not fun at all for me.

I passed on a family event tonight. I know everyone is at my cousin’s house, and I can picture the scene of bottles and bottles of empty wine, tequila, vodka, beer, you name it. And I’m so sad. I don’t want to be there, and everyone is totally respecting my choice to pass, but I love my family so much. There’s a lot of pain in the family, a lot of buffering, and I am just so sad to think of barely seeing them anymore because I no longer enjoy their company when they’re drinking.

So… I guess I just keep feeling sad?

C – Family’s drinking
T – They over do it
F – Dislike, discomfort around them
A – Stay away
R – No longer close with family

I’m not cutting off all contact, but big family drinking parties make up such a big proportion of time spent together, and I just don’t like that scene anymore. If the closeness I feel was based on fun times built upon alcohol, I suppose that’s not real closeness after all. Or just not the closeness I personally want. =(

No specific question, but if you have any thoughts or suggestions about any of this, please let me know. Thank you for all your work and great content!