Hello! I would like to get help with my behaviors in this certain area.
When I am out with friends at restaurants – or even when I buy something from them I know I should just pay the price – divide at restaurants, pay the price I am supposed to.
I get uncomfortable when we pay and I always end up saying – I’ll pay, don’t worry or – today for buying something that cost 35€, I only had 40€ and felt guilty asking for change because they weren’t sure they had change so they would check, and I said don’t bother it’s ok. On this particular example today, it was ONLY 5€ and I first thought, during these times it is ok, but I also know that everyone else is paying the asked price – 35€.
The reasons I do this I guess is that I don’t want to be considered cheap, and during dinner I think, this is nice I want to invite – and once I invited everyone for 350€ insisting to pay.  I rather pay than be paid for because I don’t want to owe people anything.  But I think I also do it to be loved.  I know this is not healthy for me and other people have told me I am all or nothing mostly.
Either way, I always repeat this and want to have boundaries and respect myself, not changing my mind last minute and saying – it’s ok, I got this.
I’ve tried to do the model, but I would like to get advice from a coach.  Is it better to have a calling session maybe?  Otherwise, thank you for your help!