The Scale Accident

Today I stepped on the scale and it said 1X5.8, which is a ‘woosh’ for me! However, then I realize that the scale was touching the wall, and when I moved it away from the wall it said 1X7.2, which is pretty much “normal” for me.

When it said 1X5.8, I had the thought: This is a breakthrough! It’s been working all along! And I felt elated, determined, and confident. From these emotions, I’d keep going with my protocol while feeling fully confident. The result is I’d continue to breakthrough barriers.

When I moved the scale and it said 1X7.2, I had the thought “oh, nevermind. Still no change”. Then, I felt disappointed. The action that disappointment fuels is a lackluster following of protocol. I go through the motions but really without much joy or excitement. I do it, but I don’t feel good about it. I guess the elated determined confidence from my first model spills over into other areas of my life, too. The disappointment from this model spills into other areas of my life, too. The result I get from this is that there’s no change in my thinking, and there’s no real change in life, either.

I WANT to feel elated, determined and confident anyway! I can see that I am letting my circumstance determine my thoughts feelings and actions. I WANT to believe that I’ve had a breakthrough and this has been working all along. I currently don’t believe this, though.

How can I start to believe these thoughts that I currently don’t believe? Or, do I just allow the feeling of disappointment and get on with it, anyway? Objectively, I don’t think it’s time to change my protocol. I like the foods I eat, I don’t feel hungry, it could be in my best interest to be a little lower carb, but I’m only really having beans and corn and stuff like that – no bread rice or flour or anything really. Two meals a day.

I’m down to my last ten pounds I want to lose, so I understand that this could take some time. But I’m really not eating very many calories. I’m doing a great job managing and feeling my hunger. My urges to binge are pretty damn near extinguished. But – I want the number on the scale to be going down! How else can I think about this to fuel the result of losing more weight? Maybe I just need to keep showing up and sticking to protocol?