Too many models on the same situation Cs forever!

This issue I have been dealing with for over 18 months and have done many models and gotten coaching on those models. Something is missing here? I am asking a coach to get further insight and maybe get some other comments and questions. I think I am showing up the way I should be but I am not getting the results I need/want. The last coaching session it was suggested to talk about what story is disempowering me. I can not figure this out. I am not sure what being empowered is for in this situation. Continuing to ask questions and be pro active for our community? Confirming that no funny business is going on (illegal, bd members personal agendas etc.)? I do not want to be on the board and want to have a home here and not be policed, treated like a “tenant” and now have all these unserving rules that are far too strict. I know people are going to do what they want but when people are doing what they want FOR people and they aren’t?

C Sending emails to bd president and property manager of condo complex where I live
T I need to keep “calling them” on stuff and making suggestions because what they are doing is not good for the community.
F dutiful
A Reviewing minutes, emails, newsletters, websites fliers board has given owners
sending and responding emails to president and property manager
getting somewhat obsessive thoughts about what I need to respond to
researching for answers (procedures, projects) if legal or find out what they are not telling owners.
Not trusting them because some of what they are doing might be illegal
Keep going over the many models I have done on this.
What am I not doing? Agreeing and going along with everything they are doing
Not joining the board (was on the board before for 10 years and president twice)
Vacillate for awhile (over a year) I just accept and then I get back into sending emails etc. because of another notice, correspondence or a neighbor complaining to me.
Keep going over the many models I have done on this.
R Not __________________ ??

Thank you so much…