I am new and not sure if this answer is anywhere in the material but I have read the Stop Buffering booklet twice so far I can relate to the buffering that triggers to being overweight. I was wondering if it made sense to use buffering in a relationship with a person similar to food? I recently came out of a 7 year relationship last year and I am talking to a new man since December of 18. I had a 8 month break in between relationships letting myself heal. I have not committed to the current relationship with the new man I am talking to because of fear and he is beyond frustrated with that after 4 1/2 months of talking to him. He wants to commit but I don’t know if he is right for me yet. However, I love his attention, kindness,words, etc. and when we argue he walks away and takes all that with him and I feel depressed. After reading the Stop Buffering booklet I realized he is like my hit of dopamine like explained with food. I quote from the booklet page 16, “Option number one is you believe that you should always be happy and you use buffers and please to try to stay on the side of the line”. BINGO! A light bulb went off in my head when I read that. Am I using him as a buffer to keep my daily happiness in check? Because when he is good to me I am so productive at work and life and I can accomplish the world but when he walks away I feel like my world is ending. If this is what I am doing how do I overcome this? With the model? I don’t want to hurt this man so I need to either let him go or move forward with him but I feel I can’t do either until I truly find the root of the problem in myself. So to speak, be authentic and have a true relationship with my life as the booklet states. Any advice would help! Thank you for your time!