When your son is suffering?

Hi Brooke, If I am remembering correctly, you made a comment awhile ago that you had been suffering because of (thoughts about) your son who was suffering.

I am in that space currently and have two questions:

1) What were the thought/s that relieved your suffering? I think one was, “I don’t need to suffer when he is.” Did you ladder up to that? Other thoughts that I might borrow? The best one I can come to is this:
C: son suffering
T: my jumping into his suffering does not ease his or mine
F: empowered/determined
A: “Ask Brooke” 🙂
focus on my own life
R: some relief from my own suffering (which shows up not only as anxiety, sadness, but also physical shoulder pain)

2) Did you offer him any thoughts/suggestions about relieving his own suffering, or just listen and be present with love, offering other perspectives/ something else? He’s 30, emotionally and psychologically literate, and also way into his own stories. I have just been listening with ears of love and not trying to fix. Always a challenge for me. 🙂

Thank you,