Writing my story

I have tons of book ideas, and I decided last summer to write my story from the perspective of what could’ve happened. I’ve worked on it a bit, but there’s been a lot of resistance to actually writing it- it feels so disjointed and overwhelming to try put it all together. Today I sat down to do some more writing, and I played around with the idea of writing it in memoir form instead of as a novel. I really like the idea, but it feels more vulnerable. If it’s written as a story, the reader doesn’t necessarily know what was true for me versus as a memoir there is no barrier. I can’t wait to have the finished book in my hands and I know that it will greatly benefit my people- whichever way I choose to write it- but it also feels confusing and overwhelming to get there. Any tips on knowing which format or coaching on what’s getting in my way of finishing this project?