Getting on the scale

I would love your help with this 🙂 I am resisting getting on the scale. I lost 65lbs over the course of one year and I got within 15lbs of my goal weight of 135lbs. I hadn’t made it to 150lbs for probably 15 years! Once I hit 150 lbs and only had 15 lbs left to lose, I went on a 2.5 month eating spree- where I have been overeating everything in sight – especially things that were not on my weight loss protocol (like chips, carbs, sugar, ice cream, dairy, gluten, etc.). I am resisting going on the scale to start my weight loss journey back up again – but I have slowly changed my diet back to the way it was on protocol (no sugar, flour, etc). Based on my clothes fitting today, I don’t think it is unreasonable to assume I am back up to 170lbs. I am so afraid to get on the scale because I will panic, get sad, feel so defeated after all of the work I have done to lose so much weight. I will feel like a failure. I will get so upset with myself and regret my behavior over the past few months. I have tried to lose this weight for 10 years. I would love some help around getting back on the scale and how it is suggested I handle the dissapointment. Also, should I wait a few weeks before getting on the scale so I don’t see such a drastic number? I would love your support. Thank you!