Recently my husband and I decided to divorce. We were in a pretty happy relationship of 15 years, and the decision to break up was quite a quick one. I am very proud of how we parted, no anger or hate. I asked him one day if he thought we should still be together and there was hesitation and we talked and decided we both wanted to leave the marriage.
I think deep down I hadn’t been happy for a couple of years but had not admitted it to myself. Since he moved out I have been buffering like crazy with apps, I feel totally out of control and addicted. It’s a never-ending cycle I start with facebook, then, tinder, bumble, hinge, then back to facebook. I feel as if I can’t manage these urges and I have work to be doing; it’s so bad that I’m even checking my phone when im brushing my teeth. I can’t work out what the the thought is causing it, I thought I was happy alone so why am I so obsessed with interaction/attention online?
– love being alone
– I love my new independence
– I want attention
– I want to feel wanted
-why doesn’t anyone want me
– I’m attractive and in good shape, maybe I’m deluded
– what is worng with me
I think I just want to feel wanted by someone, my husband never really ‘wanted ‘ me, there was a lack of passion on his side which perhaps I now crave. If you have any tips for managing these urges and thoughts that would be great it is taking me away from setting up my business which I really need to push right now!