I have been in Scholars 5 months now and worked 1:1 with an LCS Coach as well. No matter what topic, or what workbook I use, this thought always comes up to mess with me: “The thoughts I have about myself have to reflect what others think about me.”
I am following Brooke’s lead in just saying “no” to insulting myself and beating myself up, calling myself names, and judging myself as ugly, stupid, lazy, etc. I recognize this inner voice and just tell it to stop. It’s not acceptable.
Where I’m stuck is where my story about myself intersects with other people. Here are some of my thoughts I can’t get rid of:
I have to be aware of what others think about me, especially their negative judgments
If I think thoughts about myself that are different from what other people think about me, I will be considered delusional and arrogant, and I’ll be punished
If I think thoughts about myself that are different from what others think about me, I will be alone with those thoughts, disconnected from others (for example, I’ll be walking around thinking I’m wonderful while everyone else thinks I’m terrible and then that just makes me alone and disconnected and in another world by myself, which sounds like the worst thing ever)