I have been in SCS since July, weight loss is going well, the new job is going ok-ish. I have found myself fantasizing about my male colleagues. No only in a sexual way but I find myself wanting them to want me. It’s weird but not new. I have seen those thoughts before, now I know this is another way of buffering, trying to find excuses to not really dedicate myself to this jobs that I have dreamed of having for many years. I can see there must be something really bothering me inside as I also have found myself breaking my protocol, and been stuck 22 pounds away from my weight goal for about a month.
Part of me feels relieved knowing this is all created by my thoughts and I can accept them and change them, the tricky part is now I feel overwhelmed as I don’t really know where should I start on my thought work.
I also have found myself less committed to doing my SCS work.
Any ideas on where should I start organising this little mess before it becomes total chaos?!
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