My brother self admittedly is stuck in his life and completely paralyzed by fear and has been for years. He’s 46. (There’s a chance he has some mental illness too as it runs in our family). He is very stubborn and not open to getting help. He’s not fun to be around at all . . .never really has been for me. He lives 20 minutes from me. I used to see him when the family would get together here and there, but something appears to have shifted. This year, he didn’t want to get together for birthdays as we usually do. . .and sent me the strangest birthday card and the same for my husband and son. What I tried to do, as per my understanding of your teachings, is just send him love. He gets to behave how he wants to. I get to do what I want to. I don’t want to be around him. I have no interest in calling him to check in (I’ve done this in the past upon other’s wishes to help him.) I feel like I’ve got enough going on working on myself and being a mom that I just don’t have the desire to reach out.
I saw him out running / hobbling the other day. The last time I saw him, he was extremely fit. This time, I only got a glance at him, and thought he looked terrible. He was kind of hobbling / fast walking and didn’t look fit. Looked like he was 65. I got an instant pit in my stomach feeling so sad for him. THEN, I BELIVE THE MIRACLE HAPPENED. PLEASE CONFIRM IF YOU AGREE. I HAD ONLY BEEN SITTING WITH THE AWFUL FEELING ABOUT A MINUTE WHEN I SAID TO MYSELF . . .STOP . . . THE REASON YOU FEEL THIS WAY IS BECAUSE OF A THOUGHT YOU HAVE IN YOUR HEAD. YOU THINK HE SHOULDN’T BE RUNNING / HOBBLING LIKE THAT, YOU THINK HE LOOKS HORRIBLE. WHAT IF HE LOOKS EXACTLY AS HE’S MEANT TO LOOK? WHAT IF HE’S EXACTLY WHERE HE’S MEANT TO BE? THIS WAS MIND BLOWING TO ME TO HAVE THIS QUICK OF A TURNAROUND AND TO FEEL SOME PEACE AND ACCEPTANCE WITHIN MYSELF.
Is this the “Brooke” way to think about this? And if so, I just keep sending him love and see him when I see him and be loving?