Can I have clinical depression and anxiety and still have complete control over my brain?

Here are a few models:

C: depression and anxiety and trauma diagnoses
T: Even though I try, I cannot always control my brain because I have these chemical imbalances, and that means that I cannot have complete ownership of my life
F: hopeless, despair
A: Cry, buffer with shopping, cannabis, exercise to escape negative feelings. suffer, look for evidence that I can’t control my life and that I’m insecure and unstable and unhappy
R: Stuck

C: depression and anxiety and trauma diagnoses
T: I have these chemical imbalances, and that’s okay. It’s a part of being human. It’s okay to struggle with my thoughts and keep moving forward despite.
F: accepting, self-compassion
A: better able to accept negative feelings and allow them
R: Feel my feelings without secondary shame

C: I have been actively working on building up my life and relationship with myself over the past few years
T: It’s not enough because I’m still suffering and feeling insecure even though my life is great
F: defeat. helpless. sad. anxious.
A: beat myself up, ruminate, give into buffering
R: Suffer more and feel more insecure

I want to practice opposite thoughts that celebrate myself such as:
Why I am I so interesting?
I enjoy spending time with myself.
My thoughts are fun.
I love me anyway.
How am I lovable?
I love learning about myself and really studying and adoring myself.
Is it possible that I can learn to love myself fiercely?
What if I could let myself off the hook with love?
Loving myself is exciting and absolutely worth my time, selfless, easy, doable, and fun.

I’ve also considered thinking thoughts that celebrate my flaws so that I’m not so critical of them (I feel a LOT of resistance to these thoughts. an immediate self-critical response):
I enjoy sadness and depression because then I get to express myself through deep writing, music, and skating
I love all the parts of me. good and bad.
I enjoy discomfort because it gives me an opportunity to try. Trying is fun, easy, and interesting.
A little risk-taking can be fun!
When I’m impulsive, I’m able to have a burst of enthusiasm which can help me get started on activities.
Flaws are fun because mistakes give me an opportunity to adore myself and just really show my loyal and everlasting love for myself.
I am allowed to enjoy my unacceptable traits.
I enjoy being selfish and stealing away into isolation or a forest and just being with myself and existing.
I enjoy using substances at times. The tastes, the aromas, the sounds, the stimuli.

I would like to have a better relationship with myself and cultivate more joy/satisfaction. I know this was a lot to read, so thank you for your help!