Conflicted Over This Relationship Incident


I’ve been doing well managing my emotions and feelings but tonight I couldn’t control them anymore.

I flipped out on my ex BF who I am now dating again.

He told me he would let me know about our weekend plans by Wed. Well now it’s past Wed. I was torn.

If I say something to him about this is this me not being patient? So what if we don’t hang out?

I feel like by him not keeping his word on something he’s being disrespectful of my time and feelings. So the thoughts I normally choose are: I enjoy him, I’m curious to see where this goes, I love spending time with him and look forward to the next time whenever that will be. But tonight I could not get past him not keeping his word, so I told him how I felt. He told me he forgot and I should have said something.

So many thoughts and feelings ..
He forgot could simply mean what he says: he forgot. I took it as the inconsiderate thing and that he does not want to spend as much time with me as I do with him which does not feel good.

At this point, I think I need a break of not talking to him for a few days because I need to figure out how I feel about this and honestly part of me wants to make him pay for this which I realize is not conditional love. I’m also pissed that he has not made me his GF but treats me like I’m his GF.

So I’m feeling my feelings and they don’t feel good tonight.

I want to:
Enjoy him.
Put myself first.
Be happy for the time we do spend tonight and my time without him.
Not let his actions affect me – how is this possible? How can I avoid getting so angry?