Daughter struggling

My 15 year old daughter has a counselor who is saying she has signs of borderline personality disorder. He wants to start her on more intense attachment therapy. Based on research and suggestions he gave I can’t shake the thought that I have contributed to her struggle in some way and then I often think that because our relationship is so volatile I often don’t even want to or know how to have a relationship with her. I feel totally stuck in knowing how or even wanting to connect with her. Please show me how my result is attached to my thought. Thank you.