Day 13 and my Dad

Hello Coaches!
For question 1of Day 13, it asks how I want to think of myself in my relationship with my Dad and my answer is to be loving and respectful. However, when my dad talks sharply to me (I don’t think he means to but I have no way of knowing because he speaks like this to people sometimes) I get a knot inside my stomach and I snap back because it has been my default reaction for so long. When I snap back, I am being disrespectful to my dad and therefore myself because I’m not showing up how I would like. How do I just let him be him without wanting to snap back?? This leads me into the next question of how do I want to think about him in this relationship? I want to think of him as loving and kind and I’m looking for evidence of this and I know he loves me the way he knows how and I want to accept that but I don’t think he is a k genuinely kind person. I am choosing to think of him as my teacher of me learning to manage my emotions which is healthy for me and for him. I know once I love myself enough it will be easier for me to just love him as is. Any insight to offer on this topic?? Basically I want to get to the point where I absolutely do not react to anything he says and need a starting off point I suppose.