Debt and how to think about it

My husband and I are really struggling with our debt. We have agreed just now that it is effecting our relationship negatively. We are wanting to think something else but don’t know where to start.

We both agree that :

C: We have debt
T: We want to think differently about it as its not going away anytime fast
F: Stuck
A: Meeting to figure out some new thoughts
R: Agree on a path going forward

I would love some help in what to bring to the table for this meeting so that it doesn’t get heated and turn into a nasty blaming argument.

C: Meeting on our debt
T: I’m really anxious about how to facilitate this
F: Wary

Please help.