Sharing a dare update I posted to Facebook… (posting to Facebook the first time to state my intention and request ideas was also a dare and garnered great results like a link to this guy’s story which has ideas I am using! http://rejectiontherapy.com/100-days-of-rejection-therapy/ ).
Dare of the Day Update: Thanks for all of the ideas you sent me, my friends. Today’s uncomfortable dare was to go out to eat by myself at a nice restaurant without using my phone as a crutch. Since I had a gift certificate I’d been wanting to use and I hadn’t had lettuce wraps in a good, long while, I chose PF Chang’s.
Before I went inside, I sat in my car and did a quick thought model. Unintentional thoughts: “People will look at me funny, feel sorry for me or think there is something wrong.” = nervous, uncomfortable. ⏭ Intentional thoughts: “People can think whatever they want. This is no big deal. I’m a badass.” = determined, proud, confident.
I got squinty eyes and a head tilt from the hostess when I requested, “Table for one, please.” She was sweet nonetheless. The waiter did not ask me if anyone would be joining me or why I was alone. They seated me in the middle of the room which was good because being in a booth wouldn’t have felt as exposed. The most awkward part was figuring out where to look after the menu had been taken away. You don’t want to stare at people but you can only admire the decor for so long. Eventually I found what I believe was a balance of casually observing people without invading their space in creepy-weirdo-watcher mode. (One of my friends was right, it was surprising how many people I witnessed dining with others in almost complete silence. I was unaware that this is some people’s norm.)
My takeaways: I can do things that feel uncomfortable. Things that are initially feel uncomfortable can get easier rather quickly. I’m a pretty fantastic dinner date. ☺️