Brooke,

I can see myself, with practice, finally getting it that my thoughts cause my feelings and actions, and that by managing my thoughts, I can manage my actions. I’m not there fully yet, but I can see I’m getting closer, since I’m catching myself occasionally being an observer of my thoughts, especially if I can give myself space to fully be in the situation and run a mental model. Earlier, it would feel like thoughts and feelings happened to me (like day and night :), or gravity :)) or that I was” being thought”. But with the work, once or twice a week (or more times, if I’m less busy and can be with myself) , I realize that I can either create a thought, or at least open the possibility of a couple of options for thoughts that I can choose from instead of going with the default first thought that pops into my head.

However, I feel that I’m still missing the connection between the A and R, when its regarding topics that are outside my scope of control.

For example, I feel that overeating (which I’m working on) is something that I will eventually stop doing because I’m getting better at allowing my urges, intermittent fasting, avoiding sugar etc. I feel that this is in my control since by taking the right actions, I can lose my excess weight. So the A to R relationship is clear to me. I still have to do more work to solidify it, but I believe it’ll happen.

But when it comes to topics like money, career growth or relationships, I feel like the results are outside my control. I can take all the Actions I want but I can’t guarantee that I will get a promotion, or make more money or improve my relationships since these involve external entities (someone has to pay me, someone has to promote me over the competition, someone is on the other side of the relationship). The relationships one is a little easier to bridge to, but money is really hard for me to see the connection between actions and results. I feel that just because I set a goal and take action, I may not get the money I want. It does not seem to be just a matter of belief that the universe will give me back 10x the value that I generate.

I feel I’m stuck with this, and that unless I overcome this belief, I wont be able to make the kind of money I want, but I’m not sure how to get there. So intellectually I agree with what you say about needing to believe the thoughts and take the actions required. But I’m not there. What am I missing? What should I do to get there?