embarrassed


hi there!

so since i’m in scs I pay more attention to my feelings and thoughts. and this happened this weekend:
when coming to sex with my boyfriend and i want to be serious about being this sexy attracted woman and also seeing my boyfriend as an sexy attractive man its really hard for me to stay serious and not feel embarrassment. I noticed how i can not look at him at stay serious and play this sexy attracted girl who want to have sex with a man. i have to laugh or i’m so embarrassed that i look away. It seems that i just can take us serious having this wild sex. and seeing us as adults . seeing him as this attractiv man and not this goofy beautiful human being is hard.
at the beginning of our relationship i didn’t have these insecurities.. it seems like now that we have known each other so long and are so goofy with each other and know every little thing about us its harder for me to just be this sexy, attracted girl who wants sex and gets it.

we started watching a movie and i wanted sex but i was to scared to ask or to act on it. scared that he might say no and than i would feel even more embarrassed.

i would love to know your thoughts on this and how to overcome it.

thanks so much!