Hi Brooke,
The following are the models while I was still employed at my job:
(1)
C – Barb tells me to do something
T – Barb is bossy and insensitive
F – Barb doesn’t like me
A – Withdraw
R – Distance between me and Barb grows
(2)
C- Barb forgets my name and tells me to leave
T – Barb is angry with me
F – Feel hurt and diminished
A – Avoid her
R – Distance between us grows
(3)
C – Barb is kind and friendly to several of my co-workers
T – Barb has her favorites
F – Feel hurt and diminished
A – Spend time trying to be more like them so she will be nice to me too.
R – I get a little positive feedback, but not lasting
(4)
C – DeNina talks with several other co-workers for hours each day, and helps them with their work.
T – DeNina doesn’t spend time talking to me or helping me with my work
F – feel hurt and left out
A – Try to get in on the attention, as a people pleaser
R – I get a little attention, but not lasting

The following models are my attempt to change my thoughts around this past experience, but the last two models I’m having trouble getting to a strong state of mind, and still need some help.
(1)
C – Barb tells me to do something
T – Barb is just doing her job
F – Thankful for the info
A – Do what she says
R – Never need to be reminded again
(2)
C – Barb forgets my name and tells me to leave
T – Barb has a tough job and takes her frustrations out on me
F – Feel hurt, but know it’s not about me
A – Show compassion towards her
R – All is forgiven and we work well together
(3)
C – DeNina talks with several other co-workers for hours each day, and helps them with their work.
T – DeNina is a good team lead and has many friends
F – Still feeling left out and wanting to be part of that support.
A – Bring some food in that everyone would love. Plan a potluck. (People pleaser)
R – Receive some attention
(4)
C – Barb is kind and friendly to several of my co-workers
T – What can I do to be one of her favorites?
F –Still feeling hopelessness, I’m not like her favorites.
A – People pleaser
R – Even less respect from her.

I see I had a people pleaser problem while on this job, and my self-confidence level was really low. I’m not sure how I could have turned this situation around. It would be nice to get your feedback. Thanks.