How To Watch?

Hi Team!

I am a scholar for almost six months and I am not able to allow urges yet.
I did enjoy the wave of newness when I started the stop overeating program but it worked because it was something new and the moment an urge came and many more after it, I gave into all of them.

For example, I am envisioning tomorrow morning and I know for a fact that I will experience an urge to eat off my plan in the morning.

So I envision myself sitting with this strong wanting and hearing my thoughts go stronger, urging me to act.
The more I sit, the stronger they get.

This part, of not getting up and fulfilling the want is unpleasant.

Why is it unpleasant? I ask myself.

It is because I have another thought that fears that I may not be getting that food I crave so much.

Okay. So I am the one who craves. I am the one who urges myself to go and get it. I am the one who chose yesterday that she will not have this food anymore. And I am the one who creates this discomfort for herself.

How do I watch all of this from the outside when it’s all happening from within?