im lying awake at night, not able to fall asleep for 2 hours a night, lucky if i get 6 hours. im exhausted throughout the day yet simultaneously anxious because im not getting enough sleep. the physiological affects of this are freaking killing me and i am so scared ill never be able to sleep normally again. i think a lot of it is coming from the thought i have too much to do, so i feel anxious all day, but ive picked that thought apart so much and it cannot seem to be the thing causing this fight or flight response in my body. its like my corisol is up all the time so im wired and tired and not funcioning. im not sticking to a protocol. like legit its 10 pm and i thought what the fuck, the only hormone stronger than cortisol is insulin so im gonna get me some carbs.

i am so frustrated at my body! what is going on that i cant sleep, and what am i doing wrong to have caused this? why cant i stop thinking and just tun off the thoughts. all i want is to sleep so i can function normally, but its just not working.