I would love a model check on my work below. Any insights? Am I on the right track here?
T- He was not compassionate to me for a long time – judged me, discounted my opinions, resented me, did not value me. So why should I be good to him now?!
A – act resentful, discount his opinions, think negative thoughts about him, judge him
R – too often unhappy in marriage
T – He did not get the unconditional love, support, and acceptance that I got (from my family of origin) when he was growing up. Instead, he learned and grew in this area with me, through a 30 year relationship (20+ years of marriage). And of course, we so often learn via our mistake – of which we both made many.. He’s a different person now – he is sorry for past behaviors, he is accepting, he does not judge me harshly, he is kinder to me. He deserves my acceptance and unconditional love.
F – compassion
A – I judge less, I look for the good instead of jumping to the negative. I find ways to be supportive (eg – listening without judgement).
R – much happier marriage.
Thank you for any insights on this model!