My husband has expressed some interest in having multiple sex partners (i.e. threesome) and I am not interested in that. I have a few models layered here.

Model 1
C: husband says “what if we had a threesome sometime?”
T: I’m not good enough because he wants to add someone else in
F: shame
A: try to prove I’m good enough, ruminating thoughts, avoid husband and disconnect, trying to figure out why he would want to do that otherwise…and react and have an attitude to anything he says.
R: don’t get my own back about what I’m willing to do/ don’t acknowledge and love him…making me not good enough

But after this I have another thought that immediately comes up

Model 2
C: husband says “what if we had a threesome sometime?”
T: he always calls the shots and I have to comply
F: resentful
A: disconnect from myself, from him or force it
R: I keep reacting to everything rather than acting of my own reason, and believe there is a power struggle: 1-up 1-down in my relationship

Beyond this, I feel like In other situations (non-sexual) he has either brought up or mocked my stance on something in some way and I end up caving to his side- to prove that I am adventurous, or to try to connect or because I believe I am the one-down partner and believe there is a right/wrong? Anyway, I have some resistance that I would do that in the current situation because I want him to think a certain way about me.

Here is more my intentional model:

C: C: husband says “what if we had a threesome sometime?”
T: I love him and I love me and I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to and that is good enough reason.
F: confident
A: talk more openly about our relationship
R: connect to me and to my husband NO POWER STRUGGLE

Just wanted to know if I’m missing anything here and any suggestions?