Can someone really just change their thoughts to eliminate frustration with someone? At some level, doesn’t the circumstance have to change?

I am asking this in reference to my boss. I feel like a tea pot slowly coming closer to exploding. Even though I know I have a manual for her, I wonder if it is necessary to have a discussion with her to change the circumstance.

I was thinking about an analogy of tasking my son to mow the lawn. If he does it and misses a huge section of the lawn and I say nothing, he does it the same way again and again. I can change my thoughts but I will continue to be disappointed if I don’t say something to him. At some level, the circumstance needs to change, right?