I would like to create the result of creating more downtime and pleasure in my life. But I have a lot of thoughts that lead to me constantly working or doing, basically until I’m too tired to do much else. I’m always chasing the sense of being caught up, but I never reach it. Typical thoughts are:
I need to get the tasks done while I still have the energy
If I don’t keep working I’ll fall behind
I’m too slow so I have to work longer to compensate
I could get sick so I need to work while I can
I’m lucky to have work
Rest time needs to be earned
I need to keep up
The more I work, the more I can serve and give
I’m not even sure I’ll enjoy downtime so I may as well keep working
I always feel as though I am barely keeping up. I’m getting stuff done, no procrastinating, but not getting to everything that’s important (then I have more time scarcity thoughts).
I attempted to work on this with thoughts of time abundance vs scarcity, but it’s not really landing because I’m still believing my time and energy is a very scarce resource. I have tried scheduling downtime using MH1 but I either use the time to do tasks or get agitated that I should be doing things. I get, say, that a messy house is my circumstance and I get to feel relaxed about it, but I’m still very attached to wanting it to be clean and tidy before I can rest.
I really have a belief that I have less energy than other people, so I need to work whenever I have any energy to use.
Would really value some direction on how I might work on this.