Sexual desire

Problem in this department – but I know it’s all about thoughts . I can literally “think into anything “, but not in this department with my husband , and I used to be crazy about him and intimacy with him .
My thoughts about it now reflect my feelings for sure . I’m struggling finding the better ones , because I am really not enjoying sex – it takes too long and is too much work. I like to be asleep by 11pm , don’t like sexy lingerie that he wants me to wear – don’t like how I look in them , etc . I’m a super youthful and energetic 56 years old , but refuse to accept this as part of being post menopausal and absolutely sure that this can’t be fixed with mind work that we do here . Please , help me to direct my mind to a horny land . Thanks