Using the model in the moment in conflict

I understand the model in reflection but what about when conflict comes up with other people? Ideally everyone would be using a model to think through a rational conversation, but some people in my life get really set off emotionally when they don’t get their way.

For instance, it sounds so small but if I don’t like going to a specific type of movie, in the past I might just go but now I don’t want to. If I say I’m not interested and they can go without me, they’ll jump to conclusions and say: I don’t want to spend time with them, I think I’m too good for that genre, what’s wrong with that type of movie, which puts me in a defensive space. And they’re trying whatever they can in the moment to change my choice.

How does using the model work (on myself) in the moment with these people? Instead of getting into boundary stomping situations and without having to act like a people pleaser in response to them?