I finally realized that I believe it is true that I’m not good at my job. How can that not be true? Like I get what Byron Katie says that you can’t know the truth but like I still really struggle to see this as just a thought – isn’t it true that my thoughts are causing me to suck?

C: I saw a list that said “never follows through” “never provides feedback to email” on my boss’ computer while we were screen sharing
T: that must be about how much I suck and he’s preparing to fire me
F: fear
A: don’t listen because I’m thinking about it, get quiet, ruminate
R: more evidence I suck and should be fired

C: boss said complimentary words
T: he must be lying
F: disbelief
A: dismiss compliments
R:

C: my work performance
T: if it’s true that I suck at my job, the right thing to do would be to quit (but I keep staying)
F: guilt
A: stay in job
R: ?