Had an aha moment yesterday in coaching. I made the connection, when I chase people, I get mistreated. But why is that?
That’s the common pattern that I’ve had in my relationships. The more I invest without them giving the worse it ends for me. Is it because the people around me are not healthy or the way I think about them leads me to give more?
My ex husband have very much taught me this. I found similarities with my family and roommates too. A sister whom I chase for a relationship could care less about having one. At the end of the day, my relationship with my ex, roommate and sister is non sustainable.
What is the feeling that causes me to chase in relationships? Anxiety. What is the emotion that will motivate me to stop this action? I think it would be love for self and self confidence.
The thoughts that I am going to think on purpose are…
“I love me enough to not insist, chase relationships”
“I am confident that the relationships that are meant to be in my life will reciprocate”
“I am healthy in my approach of allowing someone to give back to me in a relationship”
Would this anxious need to be liked, approved, anxiously be related to an urge, self confident? I believe it’s combination of things.
I’ve heard Brooke talk about the book, Women Who Love too Much. What is her journey with this?
What content did she create around people pleasing, love and relationships? In coaching I’ve learned how important it is to have my own back.
Can you recommend podcasts episodes on this concept? I know that wanting a relationship at the expense of dishonoring me, is never going to lead me to the results I desire. Healthy and fulfilling relationships.